Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Stressed-- Day 10

Lupron 5 units
Baby asprin
Prenatal Vitamins
Estrace 2 mg
Vivelle patches

I had wanted to post everyday about my meds, but that hasn't really worked out. Up to this point it has been prenats, asprin, and 10 units of Lupron every day and I haven't really experienced any side effects except for being a bit nervous and shaky.

The Lord was very gracious to us through the hurricane. Katrina was only a category 1 and we had no major damage done. We did not even lose our power, although 50% of the county did. We are so very thankful, because had Katrina formed further out in the ocean we could have had a direct hit from a category 4 or 5 hurricane. We've been praying for people in Louisana a lot.

I am very stressed this morning. The beautiful gift of peace seems elusive. I have had trouble communicating with the doctor's office ever since the hurricane and according to my schedule I am supposed to go in for tests today, but I have no appointment. This is very upsetting because they stressed to me the importance of doing everything exactly as it is laid out in the treatment plan. They are pretty far from my home and I have to work today and the girl who normally covers me is on vacation, so that adds to the pressure. I have left messages for them, so right now I'm just waiting for them to call. Also, I appear to have lost my cell phone. I had it yesterday in my pocket when I changed clothes and I thought I put in my bag, but it is completely AWOL. So I'm hoping that they don't try me at that number!

I'm praying that the Lord will show me how to trust Him and to remember that He has all things in His hands. He that is Lord of the storm, and the Lord of the cross can handle my little life far better than I know.

Oh rejoice in the Lord
He makes no mistake
He knoweth the end of each path that I take
For when I am tried and purified
I shall come forth as gold.

That's a song we sing in church-- I can't seem to find the author's name right now, or I'd post that too. May it be my heart's song this morning!

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Day 3--26 days to go!

10 units Lupron
Pre-natal vitamins
Baby Asprin

All is going well on the medicine front. I haven't forgotten to take anything so far. I haven't really had any side effects either-- except a little bit of trembling, which may be completely unrelated since I can't find that listed as a side effect. Also, I have mastered the art of the subcutaneous injection (if nothing else, this project is expanding my vocabulary). No more funny bubbles under my skin (:~)! Injecting myself daily is not nearly as difficult as I thought it would be.

I got a surprise this morning when I read the newspaper-- we have a tropical storm which has sprouted up quickly just off the coast. Looks like we're having a hurricane Friday. Well, what do you know? This storm is going to cancel many of the first classes at Knox and convocation if it keeps its course. On the other hand, as long as no real damage is done, hurricanes can be fun. It's the Floridan version of a snow day. Only you get to wrangle long lines of gas hungry SUVs at the gas station and fight grouchy old ladies for the last bag of hot dog buns. Seriously though, I got that stuff taken care of after work today, so we should be set. Katrina looks like she is going to be pretty mild and we're thankful for that since we're right in the center of the projected track. Ain't she purty?

Monday, August 22, 2005

Countdown to Transfer: Day 1

I gave myself my first injection this morning. It didn't hurt, which I was very happy about! It is a really small needle so I think that helps. Anyway, I didn't do it quite right because all the medicine stayed in a little pocket under my skin for awhile. Yuck! It was kinda gross. I called my Mom (she's an RN) and she said that it was ok, I just pumped the medicine in too fast and probably held the needle too perpindicular to my skin. I was glad that I could call her!

I put all the times and amounts of the meds up on a giant wall calendar in the kitchen to try to help me keep it straight. I have nine different things that I'm s'posed to be taking at different times in differing doses. My prescriptions cost almost $1000. It is pretty crazy. And I'm going to the center this afternoon where everybody wishes they weren't pregnant! But the Lord knows what He is doing and what each person needs most in their life. I'm trying to convince God that I need triplets to cure me of laziness! :)

1 day down, 28 more to go! To God be the glory!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

So Proud

Brian is going to be published! He wrote an article about population decimation due to abortion (you can read it on his blog). He submitted it to the local newspapers and they didn't want it, but Christian Renewal did. They're a reformed newspaper with a circulation of about 4,000. I'm very excited because this is the first step towards the kind of writing and teaching that he would like to do for a living.

In other random news, the doctor decided that I don't need to do a mock cycle of hormones, and that the cycle I start on 8/22 will be the real thing. The tenative transfer date is 9/19, so please keep us in prayer on that day! I'll keep you posted.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

A copycat of a copycat

Brian wrote a quiz, too:


Kilby made a quiz. (Which was way too hard, by the way.) So I decided to make one too! You can take it here:

Thursday, August 11, 2005

What is a blastocyst, anyway?

A baby. A five day old embryo that has already developed from one cell (called a zygote) into a morula (12-16 cells) into a blastocyst (40-150 cells). In five days the baby grows from 1 cell to over 100. Incredible. And all of these cells will turn into the different kinds of cells that are in our body. That's one reason why scientists want to do research on embryos. They can't figure out how one cell can create everything in the human body. They want to be able to do the same thing that this tiny embryo does. It is like tearing open a rose bud so that you can find out what makes it blossom. Only the rose bud isn't made in the image of God.

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This is what a blastocyst looks like.

From the moment of conception this baby has a sex, eye color, hair color, and skin color. Depending on what researchers you listen to, its personality, height, weight, and intelligence are also there, encoded right into that DNA. From the moment the sperm enters the egg a unique person with his or her own unique set of genetic traits has been formed. In five days, the baby is in the blastocyst stage and is moving out of the Fallopian tube in preparation to implant in the uterine wall. The baby now has a ring of cells surrounding it that will become the placenta and umbilical cord (these cells are called the trophoblast) and the cells of the baby itself are called the embryoblast. All of this has a protective covering called the zona pellucida that protects the baby from the uterine environment until it is developed enough to implant. The baby breaks out of this "shell" around the sixth day after conception. There is a complex chemical process that occurs between baby and mother that allows the embryo to implant. The mother's uterine wall (called the endometrium, just in case you wanted to know--:)--) actually partially absorbs the baby and begins rerouting capillaries to nourish the baby. Here is a photo of a baby nestled snugly in the endometrium:

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The speed of development is amazing. I won't bore everyone with a long(er) post about every step of fetal development, but suffice it to say that 23 days after conception a tiny immature heart begins to beat, and by day 28 arms, legs, and eyes have begun to develop. This is all before most women know that they are pregnant. Here is a five week old embie:

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By the eighth week the baby is more than 1 inch long and all of its organs and systems are present. All they need to do is grow and mature. This why doctors caution women to be extremely careful with nutrition and what they expose themselves to in early pregnancy. Since all of these vital organs and systems are forming, this is the time that the baby is the most fragile and vulnerable. Every conception website will tell you to be especially careful to get complete nutrition and vitamins and to avoid harmful substances if you want to conceive.

For some more embryo development info, you can check out these sites:

For Photos:

For Biology Info:

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Have Thine Own Way Lord

Today was a crazy day. But the Lord is still holding me in His hands and blessing me with beautiful peace.

Here's the long and short of it:

I made countless phone calls to two pharmacies, the bank, the doctor, and the financial folk at the doctor's office today in order to get everything squared away so I could start treatment tomorrow. About 50 million details needed to fall into place ASAP in order for me to start so soon. They did. But...

I was feeling really awful today. I was even so dizzy that I fell down in the parking lot on my way into work this morning. Uh oh. Turns out I've got my period ten days early. Scratch starting the treatment tomorrow. It'll have to wait til next month now.

I'm still going to the doctor tomorrow for some blood work and to get a treatment plan. We'll see what happens with that.

"Will the faultfinder contend with the Almighty? Let him who reproves God answer it." Job 10:2

"For I know the plans that I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a fuure and a hope." Jer. 29:11

Monday, August 01, 2005

My Hope is in the Lord

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
You understand my thought from afar.
You scrutinize my path and my lying down,
And are intimately acquainted with all my ways.
Even before there is a word on my tongue,
Behold O Lord, You know it all.
You have enclosed me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is too high, I cannot attain to it.

Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there.
If I take the wings of the dawn,
If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea,
Even there your hand will lead me,
And Your right hand will lay hold of me.
If I say, "Surely the darkness will overwhelm me,
And the light around me will be night,"
Even the darkness is not dark to You,
And the night is as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are alike to You.

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way.

Psalm 139:1-12, 23-24

I have good news to share!

On Friday, Brian and I had decided to finish our Snowflakes application and turn in it, since Dr. K has not been very good about returning our calls since April. (She works for the fertility clinic and was supposed to look for embryos for us.) Well, my cell phone rang on Friday morning. I didn't pick it up and when I later checked the voicemail, it was Dr. K. I tried to call her back 3 times onFriday, but she wasn't there. So that put the Snowflakes application on hold 'til we talked to her. She returned my call on SATURDAY. Can you believe it? This doctor never calls me and she called me on Saturday.

She has three embryos in her possession for us! Three babies that belong to us! What a precious, precious gift. What a marvelous blessing from God! Three little embryos (blastocysts) 5 days old. My heart overflows with peace and thanksgiving. What a merciful and gracious God we serve. I don't deserve this blessing.

It will take at least two months-- possibly three before they try the transfer. I'll be going to the doctor's office a lot and taking all kinds of hormones. The doctor is supposed to call today and let me know when to come in and get started. Please pray for us. Pray for the souls of these three tiny ones. Pray that they will all survive and that the Lord will help us trust completely in Him, no matter what happens. There is a good possibility that we will lose all three. That would be extremely painful, but I will not regret giving these babies a chance to live. I'm so thankful that God is in control of all the details. Please pray that I will trust Him completely and not be anxious. Thank you so much for your prayers!