Reflections from a new mom

1. God is a wonderful designer! What a beautiful baby He made for me!

2. There is no easy way to have a baby.

3. My husband is wonderful-- what a rock he has been. He is such an amazing Daddy.

4. Sleep is a beautiful thing. It gives you an entirely new perspective on life.

5. Hormones suck.

By God's grace, we are all doing well. These past four days have been the most intense of my life. I have ridden a roller coaster of incredible highs and lows; I have come to the end of myself, I have been humbled, I have been amazed and awed at God's wisdom and design. I am so in love with my new baby and my husband.

Now for the birth story...

We woke up at 6am and got dressed to go the hospital. It seems like such a lifetime ago. Brian took one last picture of me pregnant.



You can't eat or drink for 8 hours before the surgery and my empty stomach was churning up all kinds of acid-- yuck! I was so nervous. We got to the hospital and went through admitting. Then we walked up to labor and delivery-- it all seems like a very foggy dream now! I got my gown on and they started my IV and made me drink some antacid. Brian got dressed in scrubs. Doesn't he look fashionable in his hair net?



Surgery was scheduled for 9am, and we were waiting for the anesthesiologist to arrive to do the spinal. I was so worried about the spinal-- I really didn't want them putting a needle into my spine. I was so afraid I would move or a mistake would be made and that I'd never walk again. They told me that Brian couldn't be in the room with me for that part, and I was really upset about that. So I had to walk into the OR alone and climb up onto the table. I was trembling and praying fervantly to God. They let Brian look into the OR and I knew he was praying for me the whole time. The anesthesiologist came and began washing my back. A nurse stood in front me and held my shoulders. I was hunched over and just stared at the blanket and prayed and held as still as I possibly could. Then he put the needle in for the local medicine and he said "Here is a little more pain medicine deeper in." I knew that was the spinal.

I immediately began to feel a little woozy and like I needed to lay down. I wanted them to lay me down quickly because I didn't feel like I was able to balance very well. They laid me down and I felt tingly and like I was floating on a raft. Then it felt like I had very tight swim floats (water wings) on my legs. I started to feel like I couldn't breathe and they gave me oxygen. They put the drape up and I felt waves of overpowering nausea. I could still feel a little bit, but that was quickly fading away. I vomited three times and it ran into my hair. They suctioned it up and gave me a new pillow. I asked for Brian and they said he could come in as soon as I was numb. They asked me if I could feel anything and I said no. Brian came in and sat by my head and held my hand. Later he said that they had already made the first cut when he walked in! He watched the whole thing. It took maybe 10 minutes of talking to Brian and hearing them suction me before they said "Here comes the baby!" I was so excited, but they had a little trouble getting him out. They actually had to use like a giant suction cup on his head!. Then they said "It's a big baby boy!" I heard a little mucousy cry and they carried him kicking and flailing to a nearby warmer. The cries got stronger and stronger and tears streamed down my face. Brian cried too. He got up and looked at Iain for the first time and took some pictures to show me. I could only see the side of Brian's face, but I'll never forget the way he beamed at our son. Then he got to the cut the cord. I just watched and watched. It was surreal.







Then they wrapped him up and one of the doctors laid him on my face. He was the softest thing I ever felt. I kissed him and cried some more. Then Daddy held him and sat right next to me. All this time they were sewing me up.



Then the baby had to go the nursery and Daddy followed him there. 5 minutes later I was in recovery, happy but tingly. Brian came in like 10 minutes later and started calling our family to tell them the news. I spent maybe 2 hours in recovery and was happy to be able to wiggle my toes again. They moved me to my room and I threw up again-- all over a very nice nurse! Then we waited and waited what seemed like forever until they brought Iain back to us and I held him for the very first time. What a miracle he is! How good God is! We don't deserve this rich blessing, but He has granted it all the same. Thank you all for your prayers and love!

We are doing well, but it is a big adjustment for all three of us. We are having to breastfeed, pump, and supplement with formula because my milk has not really come in. So we are praying about that. At first, it seemed like the end of the world, but now I am just thankful for the technology to keep my little guy full. He is SUCH a contented, happy baby. He could not be any sweeter. He smiled at me-- a real open eyed, open mouth grin-- for the first time today. What a sweetheart he is! I'll keep the news coming as I can. You all know what these first days are like. I love you all!!